I’ve had this idea for a while that we build up this idea of who we are. Sometimes we actually possess the traits that this idealized homo nucleus possesses, sometimes we don’t. I’ve felt for a long time that if you claim to have one trait, but consistently find yourself acting out in another way, then you have to look at your actions for the real you. If you then find yourself acting in a way inconsistent with your self-view, you can either change your self-view, or if you are truly dedicated to it, change your actions. For years I was convinced that I was a very shy person until I looked at how easily I talk to people once I knew them for a few minutes. I looked at my actions, and realized that what I was seeing was my introversion, not shyness.