 February 13th 2008
 Personal Development
 3 comments
Last month I looked at how to develop your conversational skills by adopting a simple trick for asking open questions (thanks to Chrissy and her guest post for inspiring this mini series). In this post I want to take this topic further and look at what the main areas of conversation actually are.
Breaking the ice and holding a conversation with a complete stranger can be very difficult. The basic rule is that if a potential topic of conversation is universal and relevant (basically it is of common interest or effects the majority of people in some way) then it will be a good way of easing into a new conversation. If you have trouble thinking up such topics here is a list covering the most common types which should be fairly easy to remember.
- Weather
- Job/work
- Family
- Hobbies/interests
- TV, music, film…
- What’s happening in the news
While it’s not an extensive list, these are the most popular and universal areas of conversation when in a general setting (it goes without saying that if you are at a business meeting for instance, your best topic would be about business matter). After all, who doesn’t have an opinion on the weather? Also, most people have a job and family, while hobbies is always a good bet because the other person will enjoy talking about their interests to someone who will listen. Then there is what’s happening in the news. Everybody follows current events or is somehow affected by them so it’s a good way of getting people to open up and reveal their opinions. The same goes for TV, favorite music, recently viewed films etc.
Reader discussion
|
 |
Justin
February 14th 2008
|
|
Another one could be (specially if it is early part of the week), “How was your weekend?”
|
|
|
That’s a good suggestion Justin. I may have to adjust the article to include discussion points like weekends, holidays, etc.
|
|
|
I agree that there is nothing as nerve wracking as the dead space between people before a conversation is born. For some people, a list of rapport builders can be a useful tool.
However, there are dangers with any conversation technique. The pretentious and oh-so-not-fun-to-talk-to Mr. Collins of Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice says something along the lines of (and I paraphrase) “I pride myself on fashioning such little compliments as may be acceptable to ladies. I practice them so as not to give them a studied air.”
Perhaps it is best to cultivate in ourselves a hunger to really learn about and from others. With such a desire, conversation starters, fillers and enders become second nature.
|
Leave a comment, reply or question
| 
