One of the truest facts of life is that trust needs to be earned. If you’re constantly lying to your friends… well, they won’t be your friends for very long. If nobody trusts the manager then he can’t create a stable team or get the most out of his people. Even telling a white lie can have subtle effects on your relationships and how you are perceived by others. But trust isn’t just about other people, it’s about yourself. Simply put, if you tell yourself you’re going to do something and then you don’t, what is your subconscious going to think?
Poor, poor subconscious. Can’t even trust its owner. He fills his to-do list with work everyday, doesn’t even think about the consequences, and then spends half his time not actually doing any of it. You can read countless blogs on productivity, get up early, go to the gym every night and take your vitamins regularly, but when it boils down to it, if you need to get stuff done you have to get off your arse and do it.
Of course, if it was that easy I wouldn’t have this blog. David Allen would be a little known guy with wild ideas who his neighbors would describe as “quirky” and Tim Ferriss would have to write The Thirty Minute Work Week to get any exposure.
The reason it’s not so easy is because our inner conviction levels are running on near empty. Everybody has spent the last twenty years writing down lengthy to-do lists or filling their calendars with well intentioned plans for the day. Only problem is, as soon as you write it down, to your brain that’s a commitment. A promise. And you’ve put it down with barely a second thought as to whether you really will do it or not. Shame on you, think of your poor subconscious!
It’s time we all started rebuilding our inner trust. The to-do list is for stuff you’re genuinly going to do at some point, not a catch-all for all your whims (keep that as a seperate list). The calendar is for capturing items that are date and time specific, not for planning out how you’d like your ideal day to go (again, keep that seperately). Distinguish tasks by your commitment to them.
April 6, 2009 at 02:10PM
I’m a big believer in training yourself to honor your personal commitments. Keeping your own appointments creates a sense of trust that allows you to feel secure in your workflow.
April 6, 2009 at 02:21PM
For me sometimes, where to put the item isn’t clear right away. I’m disciplined enough though, to move items off the to-do list and onto a someday/maybe list if the item keeps staring me in the face and I’ve had the time to realize its rightful place. I don’t like agonizing too early on, I’d rather have it flow into a review process.
April 7, 2009 at 05:40AM
There’s always that balance of what you expect to happen and what you hope to happen.
That actually gives me an idea. What if we wrote out our ideal day and what we expect to do in the day. At the end of the day, you would have a pretty nifty scale to find out how well you did. Then again, having two lists seems like a lot of work. Do you have any ideas on how to balance the two?
April 9, 2009 at 08:03AM
Speaking of trust and your to-do list, I meet many people who check things off that they “know” they’re going to do but haven’t done yet. Doing this causes you to question every single checked item on your list, because you can’t trust which items have really been done or not.
Sometimes I find myself tempted to check an item that I’m going to do right that minute, but I fight the urge. Anything could happen in the next few seconds — I could get an idea I have to write down, or a phone call, or the cat could puke and I’d be distracted and neglect to do whatever it was I was oh-so-positive that I was going to do right then.